


looking like it’s time tonight for fight or flight

by chahakyn



Series: now i’m no longer alone (a 5, 6, 7 friendship series) [7]
Category: The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: Action/Adventure, Alternate Universe - Spies & Secret Agents, BAMF Ben Hargreeves, BAMF Number Five | The Boy, BAMF Vanya Hargreeves, Ben Hargreeves' Tentacles | Bentacles, Espionage, Gen, Guns, Murder, Sort Of, The Commission but it's like MI6
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-10
Updated: 2020-10-10
Packaged: 2021-03-07 18:15:25
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,338
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26921977
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chahakyn/pseuds/chahakyn
Summary: Leonard trips backwards, landing hard on his back. He tries to clumsily scramble backwards while cowering under the long, dark shadow Five casts as he stands over him.“Please, I have a wife. Kids.”“You have no such things,” Five says evenly, aiming his gun level with Leonard’s forehead. “But if you want to pretend to make you last moments more bearable, then by all means. Send them my regards.”-When Five, Ben, and Vanya are handed a bad tip on their mission, they have to use their wits to make sure that they emerge unscathed.(A Secret Agents AU)
Relationships: Number Five | The Boy & Ben Hargreeves & Vanya Hargreeves
Series: now i’m no longer alone (a 5, 6, 7 friendship series) [7]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1900036
Comments: 13
Kudos: 87





	looking like it’s time tonight for fight or flight

**Author's Note:**

> inspired by lee's [ amazing](https://maradeur.tumblr.com/post/185090995159/agents-005-and-007-not-reporting-for-duty) [ secret agents au](https://maradeur.tumblr.com/post/629724121902841856/draws-my-au-instead-of-writing-it-yeah-twitter) art!! i know ben isn't in either of these but the idea of 567 secret agents makes my brain go crazy so i went with it
> 
> fic title is from [ Varn Horn](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ir6o8IqlV8w) by Saint Motel
> 
> (dialogue in italics is speech that is being conveyed via earpiece)

_Well, this is your stop, boys_.

“Nice place,” Ben muses as he leans against the car, looking up at the exterior of the hotel. Their target is in there, somewhere.

Five squints up at the lights winking at them before moving to Ben’s side, tucking his hands in his pockets.

“Too bad we’re not here for a good time.”

 _Depends on your definition of a good time_ , Vanya says with a small laugh.

“Oh, then the evening might be saved yet,” Five says, exchanging an amused look with Ben.

_Not until you eliminate your target. Doors are open, I can scan you in if reception gets nosy._

“Thanks,” Five hums, holding the door for Ben. They stroll in, Ben sending the receptionist a warm smile as Five barely glances at her. The clerk blushes, waving them in with a sheepish smile and no request for ID. They slip into the side stairwell with ease.

“You could ask her out later, if you aren’t covered in blood by the end of the night,” Five says with a smirk. Ben rolls his eyes, reaching out to swat at Five’s shoulder.

“Shut up, I swear—"

They freeze as the lights around them die, plunging them into pitch dark for a moment before sputtering helplessly. Ben glances at Five, observing the unsettling shadows that play across his face.

“V?”

_Hang—skssk—ang on…I…_

“You’re cutting out,” Five murmurs, exchanging a look with Ben before they both pull out their pistols. “Can you hear us?”

_I…can’t—can’t…sksss…hold…_

“V, do you copy?”

 _Yes…I…Yes, there we go._ The lights return to their previously steady state as Vanya sighs. _Sorry about that, system shorted out._

Ben can hear the frustration in her voice, backed by the irritated tapping of her fingers against a keyboard.

“Yours or ours?”

_Hm. Both it seems._

Five frowns. “Don’t like that much.”

 _“_ Are we clear to proceed?” Ben asks, gaze darting up the dizzying twist of the stairwell.

_Give me one second to confirm target location._

Ben and Five jolt at the feeling their watches buzzing in tandem.

_And…you are clear to commence. Signals have been sent and I’ll be tracking your progress._

“Perfect.” Five looks up at Ben. “Meet in the middle?”

Ben gives him an easy smile. “See you on the other side.”

\---

Leonard closes to the door behind, letting out a deep sigh as he presses his back against the door. Another day, another dollar.

He moves toward the fireplace, the low crackle of the flames soothing his nerves as he loosens his tie. It’s already been such a long day, and he still has so much work lined up, but one drink won’t hurt. He’s earned it.

After all, it may be his last, if things go badly. And if they don’t, well, he’ll be one more drink closer to retirement.

His hand stretches out for the decanter of whiskey.

“Drinking already? The evening’s barely begun.”

Leonard lets himself stumble back with a gasp as he turns to see a man unfolds himself smoothly from the armchair beside him. He stands to his full height, regarding Leonard with an almost amused expression as he tucks his hands into his pockets.

“ _You_ —"

“Yes, me,” Five says calmly, dimpling as he tilts his head, looking Leonard up and down. “You’re shorter than I thought.”

“You can’t hurt me, I—”

“Can’t I?” Five’s eyes glitter coldly, grip sure as he pulls his gun from his holster. “I think it’s perfectly within my rights to hurt you. After all, you’re my job now.”

Leonard eyes widen at the sight of the gun. “Please, I don’t know who sent you, but I can pay double, _triple_ what they’re giving you!”

“I’m not interested in your money.” Five waves his hand carelessly. “My only interest is seeing you dead.”

Leonard backs away, hands outstretched. “No, no, please—”

He trips backwards, landing hard on his back. He tries to clumsily scramble backwards while cowering under the long, dark shadow Five casts as he stands over him.

“ _Please_ , I have a wife. Kids.”

“You have no such things,” Five says evenly, aiming his gun level with Leonard’s forehead. “But if you want to pretend to make you last moments more bearable, then by all means. Send them my regards.”

Leonard’s mouth suddenly splits into a grin, and that’s enough to make Five pause.

“You’re really gonna do it, then? And she said you were the best. Could think for yourself. But now I know, you’re just a cog in the machine.”

Five draws back in confusion. “Excuse me?”

 _Shoot him_.

Five tilts his head, considering Leonard for a moment. He lowers his gun, against Vanya’s orders.

“What do you mean?” he says quietly to Leonard, eyes narrowed.

 _Five, you need kill him_.

“You’re behind the ball, kid. You’re being played like everyone else on this damn level, no matter how smart you think you are.” Leonard gives him a knowing smirk. “So, are you gonna follow the commands? Or are you gonna think for yourself?”

 _Five. Shoot him._ Now.

Leonard’s head jerks back as the bullet rips through his forehead, blood splattering against the carpet before his body falls limply to the ground. Five holsters his gun, kneeling carefully outside the circle of crimson pooling beneath Leonard’s head.

“The hell was that all about?” Five mutters, looking into Leonard’s unseeing eyes with a furrowed brow.

_I don’t know, but it…I don’t like it._

“Neither do I, but the job’s done, at least.” Five makes a move to stand before pausing. A piece of cream stationery catches his eye, folded neatly and poking out of Leonard’s pocket. A flick of Five’s wrist and the paper frees itself, unfolding in Five’s grip. He scans the paper hurriedly, then again, more slowly.

_Not so clever, are you?_

“I think we’ve been set-up,” Five murmurs, paper crinkling between his fingers.

_What?_

“I just found a note on Leonard’s person that seems to be addressed to me. To us.” Five pushes himself to his knees. “What with that and the blackout earlier, something doesn’t feel right.”

 _He’s right, there’s something very wrong with this situation_ , Ben chimes in, tone wary. _V, have you double-checked the tracker’s source since the cut-off?_

Vanya hums quizzically. _No, but I’ve had it surveilled since we started. There haven’t been any red flags_.

_But something’s wrong. I thought we were tracking the same target, but I’m on the other side of the building. Nowhere near Five._

Five’s eyes widen. “Shit. You don’t think—"

 _That’s exactly what I think_ , Ben finishes. _The blackout downstairs was meant to throw us on the wrong trail. We’re being fed two different targets._

Vanya curses colorfully; Five can hear her fingers flying over the keyboard.

 _Damn, you’re_ right, she hisses. _The signals got deliberately scrambled on my end, I’ve been feeding you different signals that looks the same to me._

“Good catch, Ben,” Five murmurs appreciatively. Ben hums noncommittally in response, thought Five can tell he’s pleased.

_Alright, I’ve eliminated Leonard’s stagnant signal, which leaves the outlier signal on the…4 th floor, he’s—Ben, he’s right across the hall from you._

_Shit_ , Ben hisses, a scuffling sound following. Five leaps to the door, hand on his gun.

“I’m coming up—”

 _No, no_ , Ben says frantically. _Stay down, try to catch him in the 3 rd floor stairwell._

“Copy that,” Five says, warping to the door at the end of the hall. He yanks it open, craning his neck over the stairwell and looking up.

_Ben, his signal’s jumped. He’s down on the second floor now._

“Shit,” Five says, turning on his heel. “He’s got Commission gear?”

 _Looks like it_ , Vanya says grimly.

“Where’s he headed?”

Five glances up as he hears Ben’s voice echo around the stairwell, steps light as he races down to Five.

 _He’s moving towards the lobby. Maintain pursuit, I’ll keep you updated_.

“Understood.” Five holds his hand out to Ben as he sprints to Five’s side. Their hands touch and Five tears methodically through space in an instant, pulling Ben through with him. They emerge outside the first-floor stairwell door, just in time to see a man turn the corner in a rush.

“V, we had eyes on him,” Five says as he and Ben run after the man.

“It seems to be the ballroom. Can we confirm?”

Silence.

“ _V_ , can you confirm target location?” Five says, a muscle working in his jaw as he speaks.

Five and Ben wince in pain as a muffled squeal of static responds in their ears. The sound quickly peters out, leaving faint static in its wake. But no Vanya.

“We’re being shut out,” Ben says lowly, turning his wrist to check his watch. “I have no signal.”

“Do we proceed? We’re walking in blind here.”

Ben bites the inside of his cheek. “I don’t think we have a choice.”

Five exhales slowly, catching Ben’s gaze. “Then let’s do it,” he says. They move forward in one fluid motion, Ben kicking the one of the double doors open and taking cover being it as Five darts in, gun raised and ready to shoot.

The man stands in the middle of the opulent ballroom, smirking and waving nonchalantly at them. Five’s gaze flicks over to the figure next to him, landing on—

“Ah, fashionably late, are we?” The Handler declares, throwing her hands up in delight before folding them primly together above her cobalt-colored skirt.

“I wasn’t aware we were on a schedule,” Five replies coolly, lowering his gun ever so slightly as he straightens. Behind him, Ben steps forward warily as the doors swing shut behind them.

“I’m a busy woman, so there’s always a schedule.” She smiles at the both of them, teeth almost uncomfortably white. “Five. Six. And Harold, of course,” she says as she turns to face the man beside her. “ I really appreciate your help. Couldn’t have done it without you.”

The Handler suddenly raises her arm, the gun tucked in her hand pressing to Harold’s forehead in one smooth motion. The shot echoes endlessly through the empty ballroom and Harold falls limply to the floor, mouth and eyes wide as blood begins to pool around him in a crimson puddle.

“Actually, I could have done it without you,” she intones to his twitching body, tilting her head almost curiously.

“Christ,” Ben hisses. Five regards the Handler with a scowl.

“Can we cut the dramatics?”

“Oh, darling,” the Handler says with a smirk as she tucks her gun back into the folds of her dress. “I was only setting an example.”

Her heels click sharply against the marble ballroom floor as she strolls close enough to brush her hand against Five’s cheek.

“I’ve worked in espionage for years now,” She murmurs, catching Five’s tie and tugging lightly at it as she gives them knowing smile. “And do you want to know what I hate most about it?”

“I’m sure you’ll tell us anyway,” Ben mutters, meeting her gaze defiantly as she shoots him an irritated look. Her face quickly smooths into pleasant neutrality.

“All the _disloyalty_ ,” she continues with a raised brow. “It’s astounding how an organization supposedly built upon the foundations of trust can be so… _rotten_ beneath it all.”

“Get to the point,” Five snaps, batting her hand away and smoothing his tie back into place impatiently.

The Handler laughs. “Oh, I’m getting there, sweetheart,” she says, syrupy sweet. “I was just reveling in how _delicious_ it is, being underestimated by you three. You really thought I wouldn’t notice your little…plans to escape?”

Her voice hardens as she pulls a small radio from the folds of her dress.

“All those clandestine meetings?” She scoffs. “You thought you were being smart, trying to destroy us from the inside out, but I saw it _all_. And now I’m going to eliminate you like the malignant growths you are. But first,” she purrs, shaking the radio like enticing dogs to a treat, “I’m going to make you _suffer_.”

\---

The speakers in Vanya’s headset crackle to life and she jolts up, fingers touching her ear instinctively.

“Five? Ben?”

_Hello, Seven._

Vanya stiffens in her seat at the sound of the Handler’s voice. “Ma’am.”

 _Oh, no need to be formal_ , she says with a laugh. _We’re all friends here, aren’t we?_

“Was there anything you needed from me?” Vanya slowly, tongue worrying against the back of her teeth as her brow furrows.

_Well, yes, in fact. I was wondering if you could provide us some details on your plan to take down the Commission._

Vanya balks, heart pounding. “I’m _sorry_? What’s going on?”

_I was just telling Five and Six here that I know all about your little plans to escape our employment._

_There is no plan—_ Vanya hears Five growl before he stops, cut off.

_And I know how hard you worked, how dedicated you are to taking us down in the process._

The Handler pauses, taking a breath, and Vanya feels a shiver run down her spine. She can practically hear the Hander smiling, and that’s never a good sign.

_It’s adorable, how confident you three are. Endearing enough to me that I’m feeling generous enough to warn you. Agent Seven, in fifteen seconds, Commission agents are going to break down your apartment door and kill you._

Vanya balks, breathing turning shallow. “Wh—what?!”

 _Vanya, run!_ Ben calls out, panicked.

Vanya’s heart pounds as she rises from her seat, almost dizzy with revelations. They know, the Commission _knows,_ and the Handler has Ben and Five and Christ, they’re fucked to high _hell_ —

An earth-shattering _bang_ on her front door makes her yelp, chair tipping over as she stumbles back in fear.

 _Oh! I’m sorry, my mistake._ The Handler laughs, the excitement in her tone quickly twisting to pleasure. _They’re here to kill you now!_ _I only warned you,_ she croons, voice low as though confiding in Vanya, _so your siblings would know that your screams will be the last thing they hear from you._

 _Vanya, you have to get out_ , Five shouts, fear dripping from his voice. She backs away, twisting around as her apartment door is suddenly blasted off of its hinges.

Her mouth opens in a scream as she throws up her hands instinctively. The vibrations from her own voice twist around her before darting under her skin, burrowing into her bones and coalescing at her palms in a heady swirl of energy.

Without a second thought, Vanya takes the energy and _pushes_. The bullets speeding toward her stop midair, quivering as energy ripples through them and splits them into shrivels of metal. Vanya ducks as the pieces of shrapnel ricochet about, embedding themselves into the walls and floors and chests of some of her assailants.

Vanya drops to the floor, thrusting her hand under the couch.

“C’mon, come _on_ ,” she hisses, exhaling with relief as her desperate fingers latch onto the familiar handle of her pistol. She yanks, pulling it out before ducking behind her couch.

A quick peek over the back of the couch and two shots fired into fray does nothing to stop the horde of Commission agents flooding in from the hallway. Vanya huffs, closing her eyes and steadying herself.

 _Breathe_.

In and out, in and out.

 _Listen_.

Vanya cocks her ear, the sounds of the room flooding into her mind like a dam broken.

 _Focus_.

The sounds combine, intertwining with each other until they’ve built up a perfect model of her apartment living room in Vanya’s mind, complete with intruders.

2 next to the couch, 3 crowding the doorway, and 5 more preparing to burst into. She can’t feel any further than her doorway, but that doesn’t matter.

This is more than enough.

Vanya’s eyes open and she vaults over the couch in an instant. Two quick shots; each hits an agent in the forehead. She turns, thrusting her hand out to stop the bullets hurtling towards her. A twist of her fingers and the bullets turn, redirecting themselves neatly into the chests of the agents by the door.

She swipes a machine gun from an agent as they fall to their knees, arming it before stepping out in the hallway. She sweeps the gun in an arc, spraying the agents packed together like sardines with shrapnel.

Thank god for cheap apartments and tight hallways.

Vanya tilts her head, catching the thundering sound of footsteps pounding up the stairs. 8, maybe 10 more incoming? That shouldn’t be a problem.

She drops the gun, closing her eyes. Her fingers curl as she reaches out, latching her focus onto the individual heartbeats of each Commission agent rushing towards her. 9 beating hearts in total, pumping blood through their veins loud enough to be the equivalent of 9 flashing beacons, begging Vanya to notice them. Her lip curls.

Perfect.

The sound grows louder and louder in her ears, surrounding her until their hearts all beat in synchronism. She twists her wrists, grabbing the energy curling in the air and yanking them like puppet strings. They twist, power shooting from her fingers to burrow itself back into the beating heart of each agent.

Vanya grits her teeth, feeling out the energy nestled in each body before pushing, feeding into it. The power swirls, expanding within each body at breathtaking speeds, growing and swelling until—

—Screams cut through the air as their hearts explode, blue light bursting from their chests as the Commission agents crumble to the floor, chests and mouths agape.

Vanya exhales heavily, surveying the bodies and blood-covered surfaces around her before slipping back into her apartment. She grabs things while mechanically running through the list in her mind. Laptop. Five’s notes. Ben’s books. Her violin. Spare toothbrushes for the three of them. Dried fruit, chocolate, and coffee, because they all have their dietary vices.

Vanya yanks open her closet, pulling out two duffel bags. She tucks what she grabbed alongside cash, burner phones, weapons, and clothing. Their plans to escape and destroy the Commission had been far from ready. But luckily for them, Vanya’s _always_ prepared to run.

“What—what was all that racket?”

Vanya looks up as she shuts the front door of her apartment for the last time. The wide eyes of her neighbor meet her gaze.

“Ah, sorry for the mess Mrs. Kowalski,” Vanya says, stepping forward. Mrs. Kowalski recoils with wide eyes and Vanya stops in her tracks.

“Could I trouble you to call 911?” She asks softly, giving Mrs. Kowalski a gentle smile. “I’d do it, but I don’t really have time to wait for the police.”

“What…what do I tell them?” Mrs. Kowalski stammers out, eyes darting over the blood covering Vanya. Her meaning couldn’t be more clear.

_What do I tell the police? I know you killed them all._

“Tell them whatever you’d like. And let them know that I don’t live here anymore, so it’d be a waste of time to search the place.” Vanya tilts her head. “It was nice to know you, Mrs. Kowalski. I hope you and Mr. Puddles stay safe.”

Without waiting for a response, Vanya turns on her heel and makes her way down the hall, swinging her car keys around her finger as she steps over the bodies of dead Commission agents.

She’s made her escape. Now it’s time to rescue her brothers.

\---

“You’ll _pay_ for that,” Five hisses as the Handler clicks the radio off with a smile, cutting off the sound of Vanya’s scream.

“I don’t think I’ll be paying for anything. You see,” she says, cocking her head, “your time’s run out. You three are good, and you give us stellar results on the field. But that means nothing if you’re not loyal to the cause.”

“Oh, we’re loyal. Just not to you,” Ben says lowly. The Handler sighs.

“That’s what A.J. thought you’d say. And he still wanted to save you three, keep you working in our system for a little longer. But that’s not happening,” she hums, switching the radio for her pistol. “I see rot in my organization, and I want it _out_.”

She raises her gun, turning to direct it at Ben. Behind her, the doors burst open, masked Commission agents flooding in and aiming their guns at them.

“The time we had together was fun,” the Handler says, turning to look at Five with a sad smile. “But all good things come to an end, don’t they?”

Five sneers. “Depends on who it’s good for.”

Ben can see his eyes tracking the twitch of the Handler’s finger, and in an instant, he knows what Five is thinking. He raises his arm as Five reaches for him. Five’s fingers touch the skin of his wrist and Ben feels the space around them _pull_. His stomach churns as everything around them pulses and shrinks, twisting down to the smallest atom before expanding in a heartbeat, the space around them reforming to standard size in a flash of electric blue energy.

Ben staggers as Five lets go, re-orienting himself. They’re behind the wave of Commission agents now, and Ben lets the tentacles burst forth from under his shirt before the agents have time to react. The tentacles shoot forward eagerly, swiping low to the ground and knocking over a line of agents.

Two appendages swipe machine guns from their hands, tossing them up. Five snatches one neatly out of the air with an appreciative noise, arming and firing it in one smooth motion before he blinks away.

Ben lashes out savagely, tentacles racing through the horde of agents, yanking at stray limbs and cracking bones with glee. Feeling movement behind him, Ben whips around. He catches the muzzle of the gun directed at his face, pushing it up before twisting.

His arm clamps around the agent’s neck, teeth gritting as he shoves the gun to away from his own head. A tentacle curls up the agent’s body, tightening its grip and trapping them in place. Ben curls his fingers over agent’s shaking hand, pulling at the trigger. His teeth rattle as the bullet pierces the agent’s skull and he quickly lets go, feeling the body drop limply to the ground as he turns.

The tentacles rear in the air as they toss a few stragglers against the wall before curling demurely. Ben can feel their satisfaction, how they hum sedately as they slide back to Ben’s side, flesh slick with blood. Ben raises his hand, letting a tentacle curl happily around his wrist.

Five appears next to him in an instant, the lingering electricity from his warp making the hair on the back of Ben’s neck stand on end. They turn, regarding the Handler as she stands alone in the middle of the ballroom, gun still in hand.

“Two against one.” Five’s lip curls in pleasure as he exchanges a look with Ben, jerking his head in her direction. “Would you like to do the honors?”

Ben laughs, shaking his head.

“ _Get_ her,” he says lowly, teeth cutting a sharp angle of white against his face. Five nods, a gleam in his eye as he steps forward.

“With pleasure.”

Ben watches as Five blinks forward, gun raised to the Handler’s temple—

—And suddenly, everything around Five is deathly still.

Five blinks, head whipping around. His gaze darts around the room, taking Ben, the dead bodies, the trickles and smears of blood all frozen mid-action, breathtakingly still. He scoffs.

“This trick is getting old.”

“Hear me out Five,” the Handler calls out from where she’s perched on a table on the other side of the room. “For old time’s sake.”

Five tucks his hands in his pockets, strolling towards her. “I’ll hear you out, but what could you possibly want from me?” He barks out a harsh laugh. “I thought I was a malignant growth, a _rot_ in your precious Commission.”

“You may be a little more rotten than the usual employee, but I appreciate a bit of nuance in my agents,” she says, standing and smoothing down her dress as Five stops in front of her. “I appreciate that in _you_.”

“And my siblings?”

She waves her hand carelessly. “They have nothing to offer me. But I couldn’t stand to let you go. You’ve always been my favorite, Five, you know this.”

Five scoffs, stepping forward and removing his gun from his holster in one smooth motion. He presses the cold metal barrel to the underside of her jaw.

“You know things don’t work like this here, Five,” she croons, smiling as she shakes her head. A muscle ticks in Five’s jaw.

“You have nothing I want,” he grits out, face twisting in muted anger. “I _told_ you, I’m already loyal to a cause. And that cause is my family.”

“Shame. And I thought you were the smart one.”

“Oh I am,” Five hisses acidly. “You just don’t have the capacity to see it.”

“ _Don’t_ mistake my indulgence for stupidity, Five,” the Handler snaps. Her gaze is frigid as she steps forward, nose inches from his. “I never have, and never _will_ underestimate you.”

Five gives her a smile more akin to a snarl before he slowly pulls his gun away, stepping back and holstering it. The Handler’s eyes glitter as she leers, taking his actions for acquiescence.

“I knew you’d see sense. Now,” she says, holding her hand out delicately, “do we have a deal?”

“Give me a second to think it over,” Five mutters, watching as she gives a satisfied nod before her eyes suddenly widen as Five curls his hands in fists. Blue energy pulses rhythmically around his skin, Five’s teeth gritting as he gathers the threads of time and space around him and _pulls_.

The tricky thing about stopping time is that it’s a heavyweight action. Breaking through it is like trying to break through a brick wall, 6 feet deep. Five’s never tried it before, never _dreamed_ of undoing such a powerful motion.

And yet, he’s not worried. Time freezes may be strong, but he’s _smart_. And that’s all he needs.

Five feels his power radiating, forming a protective shield around himself as he digs his fingers into the frozen, solid mass of time and space engulfing them. His brow furrows, energy slowly funneling into the endless expanse of indecipherable energy and meaning laid out before him, like an infinite amount of chess games won through infinite strategies that he could never even begin to learn or understand.

It’s the hidden language of the universe he sees, the beating syntax of cosmos that makes everything run, that keeps life ticking endlessly forward. And it’s all paused, stuck in a cloying stasis.

Objects at rest stay at rest; objects in motion stay in motion.

That is the most fundamental law of physics. But human rules can only stretch so far. The average human cannot comprehend, nor even begin to prove how powerful certain forces can be. How they can destroy ideas of common sense.

Objects meant to be in motion will strive to be in motion, especially when at rest. And the longer these objects of motion rest, the greater their desire to move will be.

Five tugs and heaves and _pulls_ and he can feel the dams begin to crack, the heavens urging him on to right the wrong it can feel so deeply in its bones. A bead of sweat drips down Five’s brow.

Five can feel the weight of the infraction too, an un-scratchable itch beneath his skin as he longs for time to resume its steady, unwavering journey into an endless unknown. He grits his teeth, pushing as much energy as he can into cracking the barrier holding everything in place.

And suddenly, a loose thread waves in nonexistent breeze. A lifeline, a signal, a glimpse of hope. Five huffs out a relieved sigh, too tired to laugh, as he reaches out. His fingers brush the thread, the muscles in his body begging for rest. But he pays them no mind, latching onto the string and _pulling_.

The barrier crumbles, slowly at first, and then all at once. And suddenly, everything begins moving, time tumbling over the rubble and flowing freely, eagerly filling up the waiting universe like an overzealously poured drink.

The ambient sounds around him flood his ears, and Five knows that he has precious little time, as ironic as that may be. Mustering his energy for one last blink, he twists midair, warping right into the Handler’s face with his pistol in hand.

“I’ve given it a second. My decision is still no,” he whispers gleefully. She barely has time to open her mouth in shock before Five pulls the trigger, blood spattering over his face from the neat bullet wound opening up her temple.

“ _Now_ who’s underestimating?” he murmurs, grinning in pleasure as he sees the light in her eyes begin to fade. She crumples to the ground in a heap of blue fabric, quickly staining with crimson.

“Five!”

Five turns, shoulders sagging in relief as he sees Ben sprinting towards him. He reaches out, grasping Ben’s shoulder and leaning heavily against him as his eyes flutter closed.

“Did she stop time?”

“Yeah. But I broke through it.” Five opens his eyes blearily, giving Ben a lazy grin. “It was harder than I thought it would be.”

“But you did it,” Ben murmurs, tucking his arm around Five’s shoulder to support his weight.

“Yeah, well, save the celebration for later,” Five says breathlessly, trying to match Ben’s gait as Ben urges him away from the Handler’s body. “We need to find Vanya and run, our cover is absolutely _blown_.”

 _Way ahead of you two. Come outside, I’ve got the car_.

“You’re the best,” Ben says fervently, rushing them to the waiting station wagon and pushing Five into the passenger seat before shoving himself in the back.

“I feel like a fight after all that, we should be getting into some fancy sports car and speeding off into the sunset,” Five says, sagging into the seat as the engine rattles to life. Vanya clicks her tongue at him.

“Well, you didn’t give me any time to prepare, so we’re stuck with this.”

“It’s got space, it’s good,” Ben says quickly, dodging Five’s hand as he waves it lazily.

“Who cares, let’s just get the fuck out of here.”

Vanya laughs as she presses her foot on the gas, car speeding away into the night. And soon they’re on an empty highway, adrenaline wearing off.

“So, we’re jobless now,” Ben hums, tie undone and feet propped up next to the window.

“Are we? I hadn’t noticed,” Five says dryly, snickering as he dodges the slap Ben aims at him.

“What I _meant_ is that we technically have nowhere to go. All our safe spots are compromised.”

“Well…” Vanya reaches over, eyes steady on the road as she pulls something out of the glove compartment and drops it into Five’s lap. Ben moves forward, hooking his chin over the shoulder of Five’s seat as Five shakes the papers out.

Maps. From all different corners of the continent, some of small towns and others folding out from eighths, detailing entire metropolises.

“Where do you want to go?” Vanya glances at the both of them out of the corner of her eye. “Take your pick.”

“A vacation,” Five hums, thumbing through a map of Portland as Ben snags a map charting the major roads in Quebec. “We haven’t had one of those in a while.”

“We haven’t had one of those _ever_ ,” Ben corrects, already engrossed. “I want to go to Maine.”

Vanya laughs. “Alright, point for Maine. I’d like to visit Dallas.”

“Why Dallas?”

“Just because,” she says with a shrug. “What about you, Five?”

“Dunno,” he says as he leans back in his seat, lacing his hands behind his head as he scans the map of Los Angeles propped up in his lap. “Keep on driving, I’m sure we’ll think of something.”

**Author's Note:**

> (to the tune of that james acaster great british bakeoff meme) worked on the first draft of this for over a month. then scrapped it and rewrote it all in 2 days. bon appetite.
> 
> come find me on [ tumblr](https://shizuoi.tumblr.com/) if you want to chat!


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